KIM November 15, Which begs the question: why? I sometimes ask that aloud. Nor should we feel obligated to constrain our options to Asian men. But too often, Asians are as guilty as anyone in refusing to see Asian men as sexual partners. What might just seem like a harmless non-preference for people of your own race may really just be the result of internalized self-racism. Apparently as Asians, we are, as a collective, small, meek and effeminate. Useful qualities for women, hence our charm!
But not so for men. Perhaps you buy into other myths about Asians. Those are all unattractive qualities. But just as these stereotypes do not define you, they do not define the men who look like you.
You might already know that these stereotypes are nonsense. How can you be, anyway, when you yourself are Asian? Growing up, most of the media I consumed was in English, so most of the romantic male leads I was familiar with were white men in white movies. My experience with Asian males or males really was mostly limited to relatives and immature pubescent boys in my predominantly Korean school.
So the white fictional characters that I fell in love with were my models for how I felt male partners should be. When there were Asian male characters in Western media, they were typically a source of comic relief β sometimes offensive β or some sort of professional like a doctor who was more or less an expositional prop.
They were at best likable, at worst stereotypical. They were rarely romantic, rarely sexy. But even representation within Asian media leaves something to be desired. In Korea, there are only so many different kinds of bodies entertainment industries favor, and lately, they like their men slim and androgynous. That may feed into the myth that Asian men are inherently small and effeminate.
