Uncomfortable by the deference I get from my elected office and frustrated by the constant reminders that no amount of money, education, or posturing will shield me from American whiteness, I, like Bruce Banner, hold the secret that I live in perpetual rage. I live simultaneously as an exalted politician viewed as powerful by those lobbying for reform in their interests and as an unfit and uncouth outsider that will never be fully American.
How long can I walk this tightrope without imploding or exploding? As a result of my elected office I receive invitations to all sorts of events and celebrations. Recently, I was invited to an event which I attended with my three year old son. When I arrived I purchased snacks for him and an overpriced beer for myself. We enjoyed the first half of the event and were prepared to leave before receiving an invitation, along with my colleagues, from the Senate Majority Leader to meet with the President of the organization.
We obliged and followed him to the upscale area where the big shots were. When we got off the elevator, we followed the caravan of other elected officials and their families being escorted by the Leader until my son and I just us were stopped by security and told we were in the wrong place, it was off limits to us, and we needed to turn around.
I instinctually grinned knowing what was about to happen. Security stepped aside and let us through the hall to the next room where the President stood prepared to greet us.
Completely oblivious to what had just transpired, the President greeted me first upon entering, welcomed my son and I, made small talk to make clear that he knew who I was and invited us to have some of the free food and drinks available to all his guests in this area. We thanked him and kept moving along. Two others including the only staffer of color present offered us food but my son declined. I obliged. Despite the best efforts of the host and his staff, the damage had been done and my son was prepared to rebuke any offer in response to us having been rebuked.
